Sir Garret and Lincoln - A Parody

Sir Garret of Hamel had spent the day keeping the kingdom safe. His final task of the day had been to oversee the distribution of food to some of the less fortunate serfs in the kingdom. He was knackered and looking forward to doing nothing more than returning to his keep, stripping off his armour, sitting back in front of a fire with a glass of mead and relaxing.

He mounted his large black steed, which he had named "Truck" (whatever that odd sounding name meant) when he spied something across the field where "Truck" had been grazing amid the snow which still nearly covered the field in its entirety.

He rode over to that which he'd seen and noticed that it was a mere boy. Under most circumstances, someone happening across the form of a boy, supine in the snow, would give naught a second look, however, being of Noble birth, and feeling the responsibility of his station within the King's knights, he dismounted from Truck and approached the boy. Nearby he'd spied a satchel which he assumed had belonged to the boy. He snatched it up and slung it across his back as he approached the boy.

He checked and found that the boy was still among the living, however tenuous his grip on that particular state. The boy seemed as if he may have been injured. Blood soaked into his clothing. With great haste he lifted the boy, carrying him over to Truck. He balanced the boy against his body and removed a cloth from the pack which hung on the horse's side. He warmly wrapped the boy in the cloth, and with grace, mounted Truck with the boy ensconced in his arms, both for safety and warmth.

He spoke to his trusty steed, "On Truck, with great haste. We must get this urchin to our keep and get some warmth into him lest he expires of the cold!"

Truck knew his Master and had a full understanding of the words that had been uttered. Fulfilling his Knight's instructions, Truck flew at great speed in the direction of the keep. All the while, Sir Garret endeavoured to keep the boy warm enough to survive the trip, all the way speaking softly to the boy.

Truck galloped to the entrance of the keep, stopping before the entryway. Sir Garret dismounted, the boy still tightly ensconced in his arms and with haste brought the boy inside. Garret was a kind Knight and had given his scullery maid, Rita, leave from her duties for that and the following day. He rued his decision at that point.

He brought the boy up to a tub and, after stripping the boy, set him into the tub and began filling it with warm water. Careful not to allow the boy to slip beneath the surface of the water, he bathed the child. He was pleased to note that the boy had little in the way of injury. At least that which might be visible.

After cleaning the boy, he covered his nakedness with one of his own tunics. The boy literally swam in the garment, but, until arrangements could be made to clean that which the boy had been wearing, would have to suffice.

He carried the youth to a couch nearby to the fire and laid him upon it. Making sure the boy was covered. Seeing that the boy had yet to regain consciousness, he went and poured himself a cup of Mead and drank heartily.

Sometime later, the boy awoke. Unknowing of where he was, the boy was frightened. Sir Garret realized that the boy had awakened and softly spoke to him. "You are safe, Lad. I am Sir Garret, and this is my keep. You can remain here for a time until you’ve regained your strength.”

This has been a parody of the opening of "Lincoln: The Family I Never Expected by Lindon Weztser." Yes, you have permission to parody chapter 1-2! From Lindon Weztser.

Lindon Check out the original story on truesfandom.com!

You may reach me via email at TrueFan.